The One and Only Bottle of Wine

 

AI image by BING

Yorkshire Pudding's recent post entitled Temperance ended with a "How about you?" question. I put in a short reply there, but then also felt inspired to share a memory here on my own blog.

I was born into a teetotaller family. My maternal grandfather was chairman of a local branch of a Temperance organisation. My paternal grandmother's father was among the founders of a free church. My own parents weren't active members of any organisation or church, but there was never any alcohol in our house; nor was it ever served in any family context on either side of the family. For my own part, even in my youth I never felt tempted to start drinking alcohol either. I had enough friends with whom I had fun without any of us drinking anything stronger than tea - while on the other hand, I also came across a few  people with serious addiction problems.

The Wine Bottle story that popped to mind for me is this: 

Once, back in my teens, some time in the early 1970s, my parents had invited a business friend of my dad's + his wife for dinner; and they came bearing a gift: A bottle of wine. They probably felt some consternation when neither their bottle nor any other wine appeared on the table together with the food. But no drinks stronger than 2,25% apple cider were ever served in our house. 

However, my parents must also have felt a reluctance to just get rid of the wine later by opening the bottle and pouring it out. Instead, it was just stored away in the cellar. 

Just putting something away in the cellar and forgetting about it is of course not all that odd. (For one thing, my dad was always rather reluctant to throw anything away.) But it did feel odd when decades later, I discovered that wine bottle (still intact) sitting on a shelf in the cellar of the house they moved to some twenty years later (dad's childhood home, which they added to and moved into when he retired). They did actually get rid of quite a lot of other stuff in connection with moving... But for obscure reasons, not that bottle!

The 40+ years old bottle (still unopened) was still there in 2014 when my brother and I finally cleared out that house to sell it (after our parents had passed away). 

I too just left it on the shelf, to be dealt with (together with a lot of other odds and ends) by the antique dealer we hired for the final clearing of the house. 

For all I know, it may still be sitting unopened on a shelf in someone else's cellar.

 

Catching Up

 

I asked Bing Image Creator for "Two 70 year old women with short grey hair and wearing glasses, holding tea cups, sitting and chatting, in the style  of Matisse". None of these images really resemble neither me nor my friend very much at all - but I find the "Matisse" twist a refreshing change from the "cartoon" style that I've usually asked Bing for! :)

A friend of mine since nearly 50 years got in touch recently and said she'd be in my town for a few days, working. She's an optician by profession; retired since a few years, but substituting now and then. And the chain she used to work for has shops in various cities; so sometimes she makes it into a kind of "working holiday" to go and help out somewhere different than in her own home town, for a week or so. 

Anyway, this time her stay also included a work free Sunday. So I invited her to spend part of that day with me. She came to me for lunch, and as we had a lot to catch up on, she also stayed on for afternoon tea before she went back to her hotel.

We got to know one another in our early twenties up in Karlstad (where we both lived back then), via a church and a youth gospel choir there. Now we are both turning 70 in August. Hard to grasp!! 

The last time we met was a couple of years "before the pandemic". During the course of our conversation this afternoon we found ourselves using "before/after the pandemic" as a time marker so many times that it struck us both that covid really did bring about quite a few changes in people's social lives (both our own and other friends'). 

Over the last seven years or so, we have also both lost quite a few mutual old friends (although not actually to covid, I think). So there was a lot to reminisce about.

And as many times before in later years (whenever getting together with other old friends approaching 70), I was once again reminded of Simon & Garfunkel's song Old Friends/Bookends. Even if today was a summer Sunday, and we were sitting indoors rather than outdoors on a park bench (and it was definitely not cold outside either!)

Old friends
Old friends
Sat on their park bench
Like bookends
 

---

Can you imagine us
Years from today
Sharing a park bench quietly?
How terribly strange
To be seventy 


Old friends
Memory brushes the same years
Silently sharing the same fears

Time it was
And what a time it was
It was . . .
A time of innocence
A time of confidences

Long ago . . . it must be . . .
I have a photograph
Preserve your memories
They're all that's left you

From 'Old Friends' by Paul Simon

Related posts:

Seeking Shadow (2020) 

Old Friends (2024)

Memories of Moving (2008)

17 years ago, in April 2008, I had been actively looking for a new flat (apartment) for about a year. My decision to move had been made even earlier, though - following early retirement in 2004 because of chronic neck/arm pain (including difficulties to carry things up/down stairs); and then, on top of that, in the summer of 2006, major surgery of other kind making things even more difficult for a while.

I knew what I wanted: A flat of about the same size as the one I had, but preferably with three rooms instead of two; in a building with a lift (elevator) (which we did not have where I lived); closer to the city centre, but not too noisy; and not situated on the top a steep hill... (I felt I had had enough of that, too, after 22 years.)

When I started looking for such a place, it proved easier said than done to find it, though.

But finally, at the end of April, 2008, one such flat, owned by the municipal housing company, was announced available on short notice (2 months rather than the usual 3). I went to have a look at the building from outside. The location seemed ok - away from the main road and traffic noise. The building was only three storeys high, but had a lift - and also a sturdy, "straight" staircase with handrails on both sides, instead of a narrow spiral one (as at my old place). Not on top of a steep hill, and closer to the city centre than my previous flat.

I returned home and registered my interest immediately; and the very next day I was able to go back and have a look inside. The previous tenants were a young family with two small children, who were going to move to a bigger flat; and the mum was home and showed me around. I asked if I could also take a few photos, and was allowed to do so.

The first thing that caught my eye when I entered the kitchen was the view from the window there. Below is the photo I took of the kitchen on that visit - 28 April, 2008. I loved the fact that there were trees outside, and the next building not too close. 

Looking out the same window yesterday and taking a mental walk down "Memory Lane", I then managed to also locate the kitchen window photo I took that day on an old photo CD:

28th April, 2008

The flat was available from 1 July, i.e. just two months away. Standard notice period here is 3 months, but I had counted on needing one month's "margin" for the move anyway (i.e. I was prepared to pay double rent for one month, rather than have to rely on others moving out and myself moving in on the same day). 

I liked the layout of the flat, too; and as soon as I got back home, I contacted the housing company's office. They said that as no one else had registred interest (probably because of the short notice), it was mine if I wanted it. I signed the contract at their office on 29th April, and also managed to give 3 months notice to my old landlord about moving, at the very last moment. (30th April is Walpurgis Night in Sweden, with offices usually closing early, if open at all.)

The next couple of months I remember as a frenzy of planning and fixing and packing. There were also some things that needed fixing in the new flat after the old tenants moved out, but before I moved in: like new wallpaper in most of the rooms. But I managed to negotiate with the landlord's office to get that done during the first three weeks in July; and on the 24th of that month, I moved in.

The day after the Big Move - 25th July, 2008

 

 I hired professional help with the major part of the packing and transport, and to get my furniture in "more or less" the right places on arrival in the new flat. But what I had not quite counted on was how then to deal with all the unpacking - with all the space between major furniture filled with "towers" of moving boxes too heavy for me to lift! (All my books, and whatnot...) Luckily, I did manage to get some help now and then from various friends with more physical strength than myself! (phew)

28th April, 2025

17 years later, I still love the view from my kitchen window. The trees outside have kept growing taller and taller; and in summer, greenery is pretty much all I see from my favourite spot at the kitchen table now. (And even in winter it's quite a nice view from there.)

Another Walk Down Memory Lane

"Saknar dig" = Miss you

Today, my thoughts go to a friend of mine who died two years ago - 28 January, 2023 - two weeks before her 70th birthday.

Her name was Gunilla, and she and I first met in the autumn of 1975, when we were both in our early twenties. I had just moved to Karlstad to attend secretarial college. I don't remember now if G was still studying as well, or already working as a preschool teacher. Anyway, we met through a mutual friend, a church situated only a few minutes walk from where I lived the first year, and a youth gospel choir in that church. I've never been a great singer; but that choir was really more about fellowship than perfection; and it was a great way to quickly make new friends in a new town. Some of them I'm still in touch with (more or less) 50 years later.  

I ended up living in Karlstad for 10½ years; and G remained one of my best friends throughout those years and beyond. 

In 2011 I summed her up like this in a blog post, in connection with a visit from her and her husband:  "Her whole life she has been under the pressure of a complicated set of health issues --- But she’s one of the most inspiring and positive people I know; always making the best out of every situation. She’s definitely a friend who has made a lasting and colourful imprint on my life."  

G + husband in 2011

Even from birth, G's body did not produce its own cortisol. She had serious allergies and asthma, and as a side effect of medication, she stopped growing when was around 8-9 years old or so. Later in life she also got problems with osteoporosis, and got increasingly dependent on her wheelchair.

When I got to know her in the mid 1970s, though, she lived on her own in a flat on the 1st floor (not ground floor), drove her own car (automatic transmission), and worked as a pre-school teacher, and later director.

In 1986 I moved to Borås. Not very long after that, G got married. We still kept in touch frequently, writing long letters to each other. We also visited each other now and then. Gradually, times came for both of us when for various health reasons we met less frequently, and even long letters eventually became a thing of the past. But we continued to stay in touch. 

The last years of her life, besides her husband she also depended on a daytime personal assistant (whom I never met). 

The last time we met was in the summer of 2022 - about six months before she died. That summer my brother (also living in Karlstad) drove down here and brought me back up there to stay with him for a week or so. One day I set aside for meeting with G + husband. It was a beautiful sunny day and we were able to have lunch at a restaurant close to where they lived, and sit outside. I also went back home with them for a while afterwards.

I kind of sensed then that it might be the last time we met (in this earthly life, anyway). The last time I spoke to her on the phone was some time around Christmas that year. And at the end of January, I got a message from her husband that she had passed away (in hospital). 

I'm thankful to have our sunny last meeting to look back on.

I have no photo of the two of us together from the early years, but below is one from 1995 (celebrating my 40th birthday), combined with one from that last meeting in 2022.

Remembering CJ

Yesterday,  jabblog had a post entitled Remembrance - a topic which happens to coincide with two remembrance days of my own this time of year. 

Last year, when I learned that my blogging and postcard-loving friend CJ in England (also known as John, or in blogging context as Scriptor Senex) had passed away, I wrote a memorial post based on postcards he sent me during our first year of postcard correspondence (2012). Those cards were only the first of many more to follow. I collected all of them all in chronolgical order in photo pockets in binders along the way, and also scanned them. So why not share a few more now that another year has passed... The ones below are from 2013, and represent some things we both liked. 

 

Books / Reading

Historical buildings, architecture, art...

(No 10 Downing Street, London)

Fairy tales and fantasy 

Postcrossing and Snail Mail...

Beautiful butterflies

 

 
Cute children's books illustrations

"(23rd October) I'm rather hoping that our larder does not look like this when we get back from holiday. We are now in a hotel near Hay-on-Wye, the bookshop capital of England/Wales. ---"

Liverpool Cathedral

... Oddities in unexpected places ...

"(6 November) If you ever visit Liverpool's Anglican Cathedral, you must look for the church mouse! It's on a memorial to the Earl of Derby, but even knowing it is there, it's very hard to spot. - Needless to say I chose this card because of our current visitors. It looks as though we have stemmed the tide and someone has given us a tip about keeping them out --- we'll see if it works."

Places he liked to visit, and revisit, like... 

Devon, where a daughter lived

"(May 2013) In a couple of weeks Jo and I will be going down to Helen and Ian's in Devon to cat-sit for a few days so they can have a little holiday..."

 

The isle of Lewis, where his brother GB (of the blog Eagleton Notes) lives...

... and closer to home, Wales...

"(Dec 2013) This Welsh cottage picture just abut sums up the sort of place I would love to live - not that it would be realistic..."

Jane Austen, Letter from December 24, 1798

"(18 Dec 2013) ... I'm excited at having just bought a box of Jane Austen quotations postcards..." 

* * *

PS. I've (alas!) never been to the Hebrides; but way back in my teens, on family holidays, I both visited London and travelled by car through England, Wales and mainland Scotland. So I have fond memories of my own of various British landscapes and famous places - besides all I've learned from books and TV and blogs (and postcards!) over the decades since then. 

Graduation Anniversary

 

Today is Graduation Day in our high schools / upper secondary schools here. Yesterday I noticed this lavishy decorated entrance at one of the buildings in my neighbourhood. (Decorations still up today.) Someone living there is celebrating "big"! :)

I have blogged about Swedish high school graduation traditions before. Today's local newspaper reminded us all that last years celebrations turned dramatic as a big fire broke out in the town centre - probably not caused by the celebrations as such, but it forced all the parading vehicles with celebrating (ex)students to take a different route than usual. (And the building where the fire was is still wrapped in plastic and undergoing major renovation.) You can read my blog post about that here. Last year the month of June was hot and dry. This year, so far, it's chilly and wet... Hopefully that means less risk of fires - but not so much fun for the students riding around town in open vehicles!

This year it's 50 years since my own high school graduation. Looking back through some more old graduation blog posts, I also found the collage below (photos from 7th June 1974; collage made in 2012). It was raining and rather chilly on my graduation day too.

I did not have a graduation party, as that same weekend I was leaving with my family for a three weeks holiday by car in the U.K. (Our last long trip together as a family.)

My photo album from that journey tells me that exactly 50 years ago today, 14 June 1974, I was at Devil's Bridge in Wales. (Link to a blog post of mine about that from 2021.)

...

Adding a link to Sepia Saturday 728

Icy Cold

 

As no snow plough appeared in my immediate neighbourhood on New Year's Day, the wet snow we had then just froze; and since then the temperature has just kept falling (to around -10C / 14F), which again leaves us with very icy and dangerously slippery streets. 

Today was the first day of 2024 that I ventured out a bit further than to the rubbish bins - which are just to the right of where I stood to take this photo. (My entrance is behind the bush in the background.) So you can see even walking that far is a bit of an adventure these days. Today I went as far as to the recycling bins. Normally an errand that takes me about 15 min - but today half an hour, because of having to walk extremely slowly.

Very weird weather today: Sun shining from an almost clear blue sky - but at the same time light snowfall. Or more like it was whirling around horisontally (even though the stormy winds from yesterday had subsided a lot). 

It's been worse in other parts of Sweden though: Proper snowstorm chaos in the south (with road accidents, and queues standing still etc), and far up in the north temperatures down to -43°C (-45°F). Here ("in between") we had the wind blowing, but very little snow falling. 

Hearing about the extreme cold up in the north on the radio this morning made me recall one New Year way back in my youth (1978/79), when I actually did experience temperatures nearly as cold as that (around -40°C = -40°F).* 

I was living in Karlstad back then, and the youth gospel choir in the church I belonged to was invited to a small town or village further up north in the province of Värmland. I think we sang at some kind of youth club on New Year's Eve, and then also in a church service on New Year's Day.

We had trouble with the cars getting all icy and not wanting to start (photo evidence above); and spending the night in sleeping bags on air mattrasses on the floor of a school classroom wasn't really cosy either... I remember I caught a cold and a fever (well, it's one way to keep warm!) and I suppose I must have ended up having to stay home from work for a while afterwards. While we were up there I don't think we were actually told exactly how cold it was - I seem to recall only learning about that after we were back home again. Anyway I sincerely hope it's a record I'll never have to break again in my personal experience.

* PS. I just did a bit of googling to check, and yes, it really was that cold in northern Värmland that New Year. 

After the Storm

 

Storm "Otto" passed by here last night. Fortunately, here in the inland, it doesn't seem to have wreaked too much havoc. (Worse in some places closer to the coast, I think.) Still left quite a bit of detritus here and there though...

Today the sun has been shining, the wind not too bad any more, and I was able to go for a walk into town after lunch. I bought myself a new bunch of tulips, as the ones from last week had given up.

No, I don't buy myself tulips (or other flowers) every week... That would be a rather expensive habit in the long run! But in February, with Christmas behind us, and Easter still some time away, we tend to turn to tulips here, in early anticipation of spring... And seeing them on display in or outside the flower shops, this time of year, I'm always reminded of how my mum used to get tulips for her birthday, which was 20 February. After she died, I've fallen into the habit of buying some for myself instead (if I have the opportunity).

The bouquet I bought last week was a week early - but then I was thinking of Valentine's day, and also of my friend  who passed away at the end of January, but who would otherwise have celebrated her 70th birthday last weekend. ♥

 

Bagpipes, Games and Crowds - Sepia Saturday 562

A crowd at a football(?) match, and a Scottish bagpipe band - what are my chances of matching those Sepia Saturday prompts? Considering my disinterest in all kinds of sports, I decided my best chance of perhaps finding a bagpipe would probably be my photo album from 1971. (Counting on my fingers... 71, 81, 91, 01, 11, 21... 50 years ago?!) 

1971 was the year of our first family road trip through England, Wales and Scotland by car. (We had previously been to London for a week in 1969, but then by plane.) Scotland included Edinburgh. Edinburgh included the Castle, and the famous Tattoo - or at least I seem to recall some minor version of it. (?)

In my album, I find no photo evidence of actually having watched the bagpipers, though. Only of having visited the castle, with a crowd of other tourists - and having bought a postcard.

Me (15 going on 16) and my brother (9) looking down on the views from Edinburgh Castle.
 

 

A few pages further on, I find us playing golf at St. Andrews. No crowd to cheer us on, but it is a game, and it includes hitting a ball...

 

And, surprise: At the very back of the same photo album, there are also some photos included from a school event the next spring (1972). It seems that at least once in my life did I actually watch a football match, and I even took photos of it. I'm not sure whether it was a teachers vs students game, or mixed teams from two different schools. My form in upper secondary school (classical/arts kind of program) was all girls, but a couple of the older guys in these photos were my teachers. The one in glasses was my form-master, and I think the one second from the left in the bottom row in the last photo was my art teacher.

  Linking to Sepia Saturday 562

Fading Memories of Cycling and Before Social Distancing (Sepia Saturday 512)

The Sepia Saturday prompt picture this week shows bicycle girls from c. 1925 - and I think Alan's comment deserves quoting, too:  

When I was putting together the theme prompt images for March, a few weeks ago, the last thing I thought is that we would be looking at this week's theme image and thinking "those two on the right seem to be standing a little too close together!".

 

This made me go back to my photo album from 1976, and some fading photos from my own one and only cycling holiday, with a church youth group - up in the province of Värmland, where I was living then. 

All my colour photos from the 1970s are in a sad condition of fading away now. They are also firmly glued into an album. I just quick-copied them with my camera and decided to leave the colouring as it is, without any attempts at digital editing (except a bit of cropping with one or two). I've deliberately chosen photos that are pretty much anonymous, but hopefully they still convey the general atmosphere. I think we were away for four days (three nights) - staying the nights in summer camp cottages and old countryside chapels rather than tents, but still rather primitive conditions. (Cooking on portable spirit stoves etc.) And certainly not involving keeping much distance - except perhaps uphill! (being more of a challenge for some than for others, depending on personal condition as well as what kind of bike you had...)

(Me sitting on the ground with my legs crossed.)

(Whether worrying about toilet paper, I cannot remember!)